Becoming a certified yoga teacher
It wasn’t easy, nor should it be easy. If so, where would the challenge be? No, no, there were challenges enough on my journey to becoming a certified yoga teacher. Unexpected challenges that is!
My visit to Rio didn’t go as planned. Unexpected problems nearly made me miss my flight, but I pushed through it all anyway. Nothing could stop me from going to my teacher training. Nothing. With a lot of effort and the help of my friends I was able to catch my flight and arrive on time, and so the teacher training began.
The first week went off with a great start. My room was peaceful and comfortable and had a breathtaking view on the forrest, my roommate was adorable, the food healthy and delicious and the yoga training meaningful, fun and sweaty. All was great, until I broke my small toe. Are you serious? Who breaks her small toe on a yoga teacher training?
So, I had to accept not being able to take part in the Asana practice, which is the physical part of yoga. I would still join every single class and make notes on the sequences and luckily there is much more to yoga than just the postures. So I wasn’t
completely lost. Even so, when I was sitting against the wall with my notebook and my feet up on a couple of bolsters, looking at my classmates who were enjoying a beautiful sequence, I truly wished that I could be one of those sweaty bodies on a yoga mat too.
It seemed though, that my lesson to be learned was off the matt instead of on the matt. It was time for me to learn how to take a step back. Being grateful for this lesson even though the way it was being taught made me walk funny, it paid off. After a week my toe was healed and strong enough to join the Asana practice again.
Happy as I was, the universe decided that my case I wasn’t closed yet. Just after my toe healed enough to re-join the practice, I was put down with a very bad fever. Laying in bed and sleeping the whole day was all I could at this point. No food stayed in for days. Emotions started to kick in now. Why did this happen?
This training is so important for me. Is this the universe testing me?
‘’This is advanced yoga’’ my teacher had said and he was right.
The only thing I could do is to accept what is. That doesn’t mean giving up. I did the best I could, but I was also being honest with myself. I had to learn the hard way, to listen to my body. She comes before my desires. In fact, I had learned to step away from all my desires these last few days. The desire to be there where everybody else is. The fear to miss out on things, which in the end caused me to miss out on myself. I had learned to be truly present, here in the now and in my body. Not letting my mind wonder to what others might be doing at this moment, but instead focussing on what I’m doing. How do I feel? What do I need, instead of want.
I had been sleeping outside in my hammock a lot. Not being able to smell the flowers around me, but able to feel the fresh air as a healing energy. I had been watching beautiful yellow butterflies and birds dancing with the wind. I would close my eyes and listen to all the songs around me, played the instruments of nature. I let my breathe become one with the rhythm and just then in that moment I knew this is my yoga practice. We are all connected, we are one.
After I recovered from my fever I stil couldn’t eat much as the nauseous feelings never left. A good breakfast was all it was until the end of the training. Even on the last day, on the graduation ceremony, I was struck hard with an unbearable pain in my stomach that literally put me down.
I had some major challenges along my way to becoming a yoga teacher, but I always did my best to stay positive and to see the lesson in what was happening. I had my down moments, but I never complained. I can truly say that this teacher training had his very unexpected twists, but I learned more from it then I could ever have hoped for. The lessons I have learned are very valuable to me and have been integrated into my daily life. This way I will also bring these lessons into the Yoki Yoga project to share with others with the intention that it will empower them.
My knowledge is deepened. My view is broadened. My skills as a teacher has developed. The best part is that I am still learning and I will always be, for I am forever a student.
‘As our Journey in the unending process of learning and growing in wisdom progresses, we must endeavor to keep a fresh context, a fresh attitude, a beginners mind.’
– Ganga White